Clean The Fan Lyrics!

by Jayme Gutierrez

Lyrics to the song “clean the fan”:

If you want to clean this stupid fan,
It’s not as easy as you plan…
You see, the battery and the screws should be removed,
And then three pannels with more screws,
Behind them, now it gets involved…

Start to slide the optical drive out,
“He means the DVD drive”
Take out the hard drive and this plug,
“Just grip the tag and pull upwards”
Look how they hide the screws,
Under parts that we remove,
I think it’s pretty clear, that we’re not welcome..


Why’s it have to be complicated,
All I wanted to do was clean the fan,
“Clean the fan, as good as new,
But spic and span is hard to do”,
I just wanted a simple pannel,
So I can get to the fan without the fuss.


But I guess they made it like that so that you can’t clean it and then it runs out of warranty and you end up having to by another one because it’s broken… Great.

Disconnect the wifi cables,
“All of this just to clean a fan”
Undo these clips to free the RAM,
“RAM means; Random Access Memory”
Now we flip the whole thing over,
Take the top half off,
I’ll show you how,
To take it all apart,
But don’t go yanking on it because there’s still cables attached to it..

Turn the screws to free the keyboard off,
“unplug it before you go tugging it off”
Then start unplugging all the plugs,
“Plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug”
Now the battery case and speakers,
Bare in mind that speakers have a magnet,
So just keep them free,
From any piece of circuitry.


Why’s it have to be complicated,
All I wanted to do was clean the fan,
“Clean the fan, as good as new,
But spic and span is hard to do”,
I just wanted a simple pannel,
So I can get to the fan without the fuss.


Now we reach the sad part of this song,
“Sad part”
A choice to make before we can go on proceed,
“That doesn’t rhyme”
See, if you want the fan to part,
From processor and graphics card,
You’ll have no choice but to remove,
Some thermal gel, you can’t reuse,
But you’ve come so far, so why refuse,
To buy a tiny tube of thermal gel?

“Lift this up,
Don’t forget about the plug,
Then a couple more screws,
And we can finally begin to..”

“Clean the fan as good as new,
But spic and span is hard to do..”

“So much fluff,
Gets stuck inside the heatsink,
Why is there no easy way to clean this?”

Clean the fan, clean the fan,
Clean the faa, aa, aaaa, aan yeah,
And then improvise yeah,
And say lots of phrases that don’t make sense,
Do some twiddly bits,
And, and go really high,
Yyyyeee, eee, eeh, ehh, yeah,
Oooh baby,
Make sure you say baby,
Cos everyone says baby,
Yeah, baby yeah,
Bay, bay, bay, bay, baby.